And All These Things Will be Given to You as Well: Worship, Idols and Maturity

Addictive behaviours simulate experiences a mature adult should fully enjoy—pornography simulates intimacy, games simulate achievement, social media simulates social integration. However, these artificial simulations often hinder the enjoyment of the real activities. In this essay, I explore the rightful role of simulations in human life through the lenses of the neuroscience of addiction.

3. March 2025 by Maria Eduarda Barbosa

Introduction

I felt the blood rush to my face and suddenly had the urge to grab my brother by the shoulders, look into his eyes, and say, "Snap out of it!" The cause? I witnessed my brother half-heartedly dismissing my father by saying, "I've done all my tasks already, so now I can play." As usual, he was playing video games. By now, the reader may either think I am some sort of zealot or have realized my brother is, in fact, an adult. At that moment, I couldn’t pinpoint exactly what I found so depressing about the scene, aside from the fact that, had my brother been a child, it would have been completely fine. The answer came to me when I heard a phrase I’ve known by heart for as long as I can remember: "But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well" (Mt 6:33). All finite games we play urge us to play them again because they simulate an important aspect of the ultimate infinite Game—the only Game that should be played with the purpose of continuing to play. However, only a mature adult can engage in this Game successfully. If you desire to be such a person, if you want it badly enough to give up minor games, you will become what you were pretending to be while playing them. When I saw an adult waiting for playtime, I saw someone who had given up the real thing and clung to the simulation. In spiritual terms, I saw someone worshipping a false god.

The same chapter of Matthew's Gospel illustrates this idea better than I could ever do. Christ said,

"Beware of practicing your piety before others in order to be seen by them; for then you have no reward from your Father in heaven" (Mt 6:1)^[1]

and went on to explain how God sees what actually flows from your heart, not what it looks like you're doing. He then drives the message home, saying:

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal." (Mt 6:19)^[1]

Temporal goods are but a shadow of the Summum Bonum, and sacrificing the highest on the altar of the lowest is the definition of idolatry—and that is bad business. Modern society may not feel the need to simulate religious piety to feel good about itself. However, we do have social media simulating social approval, video games simulating achievement, and pornography simulating self-giving love. These things leave us addicted, trapping our motivational systems and rendering us incapable of pursuing the real goods they mimic.

Social Media and Social Integration

We swipe down on our phones to check for new notifications, a feature borrowed from slot machines and based on a neurological mechanism known as "random intermittent reward," meaning we check our phones because maybe someone will have reacted to something we said.^[2] Why does it work? Because, normally, our motivational systems are meant to facilitate the practice of hard activities, and hard activities, by definition, don’t provide a constant stream of success. Why is an Instagram comment interpreted as a reward? Because we are social creatures, and the world is harsh, so we need each other to thrive in difficult times. What is the problem with the way social media simulates these aspects, and who are we to call it a simulation anyway? The problem is that the frequency and shallowness of virtual interactions guarantee success will be achieved online much more often than in real life, and that such success will not translate into effective support in difficult times. It is way too easy to manifest approval, but most people who leave comments on a post about your wedding will not help you look after your healthy kids while you take care of a sick one. The pseudo-support you receive will give you the illusion of being well-connected—at least until the flood comes and proves otherwise.^[2]

Videogames and Personal Achievement

If social media simulates social achievement, video games simulate personal achievement. We are meant to face hardship before receiving a proportional reward, reinforcing our motivation to persist (e.g., a hunter killing a mammoth to feed his community)^[8]. However, in-game achievements come in much shorter time frames. No matter how hard the game is, you are unlikely to take more than a year to reach high performance—unlike academic, professional, or artistic pursuits. Furthermore, online achievements rarely translate into tangible benefits for individuals or their communities. As a result, players who seek solely virtual achievement, seek meaningless rewards while neglecting real-world responsibilities, as demonstrated by research from Armita Khorsandi and Liping Li.^[3]

Pornography and Intimacy

The appeal of video games is often enhanced by overt or subtle sexual imagery. (Anyone who doubts this can look up pictures of League of Legends characters.)^[4] This brings me to another area where society remains trapped in a simulation: sexuality. Pornhub ranks among the ten most visited websites in the world, with traffic reaching approximately 75% of Instagram’s.^[5] Pornography, at its core, is a simulation of sexual intimacy, providing immediate gratification without effort. Consequently, it fosters addiction, and, if we are to believe self-reports, reduces users' motivation for real relationships and diminishes their capacity for sexual arousal.^[6]

Erotic love should be an integral part of a lifelong intimate relationship. The Song of Songs, for instance, uses, in the literal middle Bible itself, erotic imagery to illustrate love that is total, free, faithful, and fruitful—qualities that reflect the relationship between God and His people.^[7] Such imagery becomes incomprehensible when sexuality reduces one’s own body and a partner’s body to mere objects for instant gratification. In contrast, sex within a healthy relationship fosters physical connection, not with a desired object, but with a desired person.^[8] Unlike pornography, which isolates individuals, real intimacy strengthens bonds between spouses. This is evident in the higher rates of sexual activity and satisfaction among married couples.^[9][10]

Simulation’s Rightful Place

That doesn’t mean there’s no place for simulation in a healthy life. A child playing house is simulating the interactions that foster social integration and prepare them for forming a family. A child playing games, even video games, with friends may be simulating teamwork and negotiation skills that build real competence and achievements. A pilot using a flight simulator is preparing to fly a real plane. Simulations serve a valuable purpose when they provide a low-stakes opportunity to prepare for real activities. They should leave you better equipped for what they simulate—not less.

No one will get anywhere in a flight simulator. No one will build deep friendships through Instagram posts. No one will become successful by playing League of Legends. And no one will fulfill their need for intimate connection through pornography. The difference is that a flight simulator makes a person a better pilot, while excessive social media, video games, and pornography leave users less capable of achieving the real good they imitate.

Conclusion

It’s crucial to recognize that these addictions are compelling precisely because they simulate what we, as humans, are meant to have. If we want to be mature adults and live life to the fullest, we cannot afford to sacrifice what we need most on the altar of what we want now. We must take a leap of faith and trust that if we seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, all these things will be given to us as well.